Letmeseeyou, 44

looking for dark....gothic......light hi ladies, a typical night for me.i go out to the pub by myself.i sit down,order a drink,then wait. i'll wait for what always happens
"are you ok" someone will ask,"yes i'm fine" i reply..."man you look mad" someone will ask,"nope, i am not" i will say with a smile.and usually an night out is not complete with a lady asking me if i am sad
i am very much alone,all alone it seems.and it has always been that way
sorry ladies,i do not wear all black,i have no tats,no piercings,and no stars..i need not wear any of that for my ora and my emotionless face do enough as it is,heck the way that it is now i would probley start making people crack
i am not gothic,i am not catholic,it seems though that i am some sort of a spiritual whipping boy which i see as both a blessing and a curse..
imagine if i told all these people the truth,what if i told them there is reason for concern,what if i told them that what they say,what they do,and how i feel about them can have a drastic affect on their future "if i so choose to make that choice"
i am all alone,i like it,i hate it.i need to find a lady that knows who she is.i need a lady that is special,and in touch with a world that is not suppose to exists. i have never dated a gothic girl before and i am hoping that is what she is.........